When my book, Divine Realisation – One Soul’s Journey, was published I thought to myself “That’s it, there’s no more I want to say or leave for my grandchildren”, every word in that book was written from my heart. There was a sense of contentment in being able to record reflections on everything I had learnt about to that date, lessons that gave me knowledge of the true meaning of my life.
I became fully aware that I was only scratching the surface of all the topics I had studied in my thirst for knowledge, geometry, quantum physics, astrology, the subconscious mind, world religions and so on, I found and still find that the more I learn the more I have to learn, it is like a never ending quest. I am also aware that if I had all the knowledge in the world about the reason for our existence as individual souls, walking our walk, talking our talk, experiencing the everyday ups and downs in our lives, I wouldn’t be walking this planet. As I said, “Life is a schoolroom” and we are all here to learn lessons.
Turning back to my little book, as I call it, I was satisfied enough to know that I had succeeded in not delving too deep into the many subjects I covered, keeping the book ‘light’.
This ‘light’ was transferred to the weight of the book and after first seeing it on the shelf of my local book store doubts flooded my mind, there was my book, the skinny small one tucked in between the bigger, taller, wider and fatter books and I couldn’t help but wonder whether I should have made mine ‘fatter’ too, perhaps expanding on the subjects I covered. I pondered on this for a while until I accepted that I would have introduced more pages and words from my mind, instead of my heart so I rested easy hoping that the comments I had already received, which indicated the book was one that could be read again and again, would make it spiritually ‘fat’!
I guess what surprised me most were the re-actions to the content of the book, I was humbled by the letters and emails I received, which seemed to indicate that I had tapped into a pulse which fed the hunger and curiosity in others for more understanding of why we are ‘here’, what the purpose is, beyond the ages and stages we live through. It seemed that I had somehow helped readers look at life differently; perhaps taking them out of the box of their everyday existence, pointing them towards a potential different form of thought which they obviously had the freewill to accept or reject. I was asked many questions about problems readers were going through and although my wish was not to become an Agony Aunt I would happily give them my own perspective on what may have been happening in their lives, always coming from love, not judgement hoping some help could be given from another point of view. If you are able to look through the darkness and negativity of worry (which like a rocking chair gets you nowhere) and ‘imagine’ looking at the whole scenario through the eyes of love, you will find the answer and peace you want.
I obviously don’t have all the answers to life’s questions, oh no, I ‘know’ well enough that I am a mere student on the subject of our existence and what surrounds it, I’m working my way through the grades and enjoying every lesson which takes me deep into my inner being, finding it absolutely fascinating as my soul sorts the wheat from the chaff, shining at the truth and dimming at falseness, usually placed carefully ‘out there’ by those whose agenda is based on keeping fear alive.
It seems strange but for many years I felt very alone, if I told other what I had discovered they would either think I was ‘nuts’ or strange, I had discovered so many missing links in life that I often sat in wonder at it all, the faith in this knowledge was so strong that I often thought, as mentioned in my book, that I could walk through a wall with it, does that seem strange? Life is strange.
As I sometimes say, if you have a view about life, try to ensure it is an informed one, one which you have studied don’t be led by others to believe what they want you to believe, make your own mind up from what you ‘feel in your heart’ is the Truth, whatever that is. You will not always find this from the media, friends or social networks, who can feed or be fed by a lot of misinformation which is prevalent in these times. It is good to be an individual who is not afraid to stand to one side of the fashion of the everyday thoughts of others, be alone, be strong, don’t let doubt creep into the power of your knowledge and convictions. Holding your counsel and silence is sometimes the best, if you go against the tide you can get sucked under by those who are only too ready to sink you in a volley of their metaphorical thought bullets.
For me, I looked out into the wilderness of the world, sometimes coming across similar souls on the same journey, nodding as we passed through each other’s lives realising I was not alone in my search. Maybe, for some readers of my first book I had acted as a conduit, creating a spark which reminded them of something they already knew, at soul level.
Some readers questioned and wondered about the ‘gaps’ I had left in my book where I failed to expand on why and how I had arrived at the bottom of a dark well where happiness was a struggle and laughter a distant memory, until a nudge from a family member who one day said “Patricia, you don’t laugh anymore?”. I can only say that it wasn’t within me to fill in those gaps and expand further, I don’t believe in raking through the ashes of negative memories or naming and shaming, now knowing and understanding that everyone in life has a part to play in our spiritual growth. When going through any upset we are so engrossed and surrounded by the power others can have over us that we can’t literally see ‘through’ what is happening, we just wallow and swim around in our emotions not realising that we are all actors on the stage of life, some playing the good parts, some playing the ‘perceived’ bad parts. Every bad experience was a lesson and I look back with thoughts of gratitude towards my ‘teachers’ who served to make me stronger, stronger as an individual soul, teaching me to cling on to the next rung as I climbed towards the top of the well learning to draw on my inner strength which took me higher and higher towards the ‘light’.
With the metaphorical Armour of Knowledge, Shield of Light and Sword of Truth and my own new-found truth nothing can touch me in the same way again. Occasionally, with work pressures, I get drawn back into the ‘the treacle of life’ where from time to time I lose focus as I swim around in sticky situations, however, it helps to examine my reactions as I look for the lesson in front of me. Yes, life is certainly a schoolroom and we never stop learning, although we are let out into the playground of life from time to time:)